Saturday, May 24, 3062
I’m so pleased to announce the birth of our son, Mikhail, who came into this world last Monday at 2:16 AM. It was a long and difficult labour, I was told that I shouldn’t have any more children. Instead of feeling sadness I think I was relieved. The night air was cold when we left the hospital and I couldn’t help but dwell on the eerie chill in my relationship with Arthur.
You’ve only just left and already I miss you. I was so pleased that you and Pasha decided to visit us in Twinbrook, it was wonderful to see you all. I’m also grateful that Pasha took the time to give me such good medical advice. This pregnancy was so difficult compared with Eugene and Arthur Jr. and I don’t understand why. My dreams have been so strange since Mikki’s birth. At night my head is filled with visions of pills, garbage and cough syrup. I’m tired all the time and I’ve become obsessed with checking for new wrinkles. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, I look like my grandmother in her apron! I wanted more out of life than this.
I’ve taken the news of Aunt Chantel’s death quite badly, I just can’t stop thinking about it. For her to die on Eugene’s birthday felt strange, almost too sinister to ignore. Something just doesn’t seem right about this wonderful life in Twinbrook, I can feel it in my bones. Liliya, do you think I’m having a mid-life crisis?
All my love,